Wednesday, January 23, 2008

My silver lining

Amid all the tiredness, nausea, and vomiting, I need to remind myself often that this will all be worth it in the end. Max is my silver lining even if he did finally take a nap today and now is having trouble settling and going to sleep tonight. As an aside, I warn you to be careful of what you wish because it just might come true.

Scene: Me checking to make sure that Max was awake from his nap. I walk in his room and he's standing in his crib holding pages of a book he tore.
Max: Look momma, paper!
Me: Max, those are pages of a book. I've told you, we don't treat our books like that. We need to be more respectful. Don't tear the pages of your books anymore.
Max: Where's the tape? Go get tape. You can fix it, momma.

Scene: I'm wrapping up work and we are saying goodbye to Max's nanny.
Max: Momma, go to couch. Go lay down. Let's cuddle.
Me: I'd love to do nothing more.
(thank goodness he's loving this mommy cuddle time in front of the TV at night cause I don't think I could have managed much more tonight)

Scene: I'm using the toilet and Max is standing in front of me making faces to himself in the mirror.
Me: Max, did you have a poo yet today.
Max: No, just farts.

Scene: Max has been in his crib for at least half and hour and having trouble settling. I'm regretting wishing he'd take a nap since bedtime is so much easier when he's completely exhausted from no nap.
Max: Fresh diaper Momma. Fresh diaper Momma. Fresh diaper Momma
(heard through the monitor. I go investigate. He's got his PJ's off, but thankfully not his poo diaper.)
Max: I take of my PJ's.
Me: I see that.
Max: Stinky poo poo. Need fresh diaper.
Me: Thank you for not taking off your poo poo diaper.
(I change him. Was told he needed fresh PJ's too. Got him redressed in different PJ's and back in crib. Go put the poo diaper outside and wash my hands)
Me: (going back into his room) What?
Max: You wash your hands. You take out poo bag and wash your hands.
Me: Yes, that's what I did. It's night night time. Now, go to sleep.

I go back to my room, still feeling completely miserable. Puke up a storm in my bathroom sink hard enough that the tears are running, there's nothing left in the contents of my stomach, and joy of all joy's (NOT) some minor urinary inconsistence. As bad as the barfing can be sometimes, it's like the poison of my gut is gone and I'm actually feeling better than I have all day.

I'm really trying to watch how much I tell Max that I'm tired, not feeling well, has a tummy ache because this pregnancy is actually going to be a significant part of this life to this point (9 months out of 36) and I want him to remember more than that. However, he's a smart cookie. Luckily, at least so far, I've only done minor barfs, not major pukes when he's been around so far. Again, thank goodness he is loving the momma on the couch cuddle time all to himself without doing chores, talking on the telephone, just cuddled next to him. He does get up to play and do things, but comes back frequently to snuggle and cuddle in and occasionally hurl himself at me while laughing and saying "I'm jumping" so I have to keep my eye on him. :)

Dr. H, the SR doc, said that most women feel significantly better after the SR so much so that they have a hard time taking it easy the week after the procedure. Plus, I'm sure it will help being out of the first tri. One month to go. Not that I'm counting or anything. And, praying that I will actually start feeling better at that point.

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