Is it time?

How did my OB apt. go today? Glad you ask. It went well and caused stress. I’m 4 cm dilated and 90% effaced and -1. What does -1 mean again? Dr. P said, “How about I send you over to the hospital, we break the water, and you have the baby by the weekend.” My response was, “How about we see what happens.” She was agreeable, but did let me know that she wasn’t going to be available on Saturday or Sunday night. Or, was it Friday and Saturday night? Also, my coach is working tonight, tomorrow night and Saturday night. When I gave here the news, she called some of her colleagues and can get coverage, but then would need to work a 24 hour shift. My cousin is also pressuring me into going in. She’s letting me know how much easier it would be with her here to take care of the dogs and everything. All true. Everyone wants an answer. Everyone wants me to go sooner rather than later. This isn’t how I pictured it. I pictured an empty house with me and the dogs and the doula for early labor then going to the hospital. I have decided for now to let nature take its course. I would like my dr. and my coach there, but don’t really want to rush it at this point.

I hadn’t had any contractions that I felt and obviously got to 4 cm with really no pain, just pressure. I have been a bit crampy and bleeding a bit since the exam, but Dr. P and the doula said this is normal. It could go away or it could be the start of things.

Here is my current schedule. A friend is coming over after work to do a COSTCO run with me. The crib is being delivered tomorrow. St. Vincent de Paul society is coming tomorrow to pick up the old furniture. Another friend is coming over in the afternoon with her twins to swim in the afternoon. And, I have tickets to a Dodger game with a friend for her birthday. On Saturday, I have an SMC get together. I really would like to still do all of these things. Then, have the baby.

Monday. Monday seems like a good day to go into labor. Don’t you think?

My Dr. really didn’t like the idea of me going to the Dodger game. She is worried that my water will break and I won’t be able to get out of there and to the hospital. I get the distinct impression that once I start contracting and/or my water breaks they expect things to go very fast.

Ugh! What to do? What to do? It isn’t that I don’t want to see my baby and hold him in my arms. It is just that I want it to happen on its own time table instead of for convience for me or anyone else.

Is this so wrong?

I’m feeling very tired, but less crampy. I think I will go lay down for a bit and see what happens.

The time is soon. That is for sure. The question is…how soon?