Monday, November 13, 2006

“Going to Work”

Max’s least favorite words these days are as follows:

“Max, momma is going to go take a shower and then work.”

“Max, momma is going to go take a shower.”

“Max, momma has to go work.”

This has been going on for a few weeks now. I’ve tried different variations with the same results. He just throws an absolute fit and either clings to me or reaches for me (if Noemi is holding him). I don’t want to just disappear, but I hate to cause such a scene. I try not to belabor the point. In the past, I could distract him with a game or a toy or something, but not recently. So, I just give him another hug/hold him for about 20 seconds, acknowledge his feelings, and leave.

Monday’s are always worst. Major, major melt down this morning. Poor guy.

Not only is it hard on him. I know that it is hard for me and think it is hard for Noemi. She commented the other day about how Max isn’t even going to want to see her when she comes back from her two week trip to Guatemala. She has commented in the past how in the past, when the mom works out of the house that the kids cry when she leaves at the end of the day. She has told me many times that Max is fine and happy with her when I’m not around. I believe her. I do. If I didn’t, I would not trust her with my son.

One day last week (must have been Thursday?), I popped out real quick while Max was eating lunch to grab something to eat/drink myself and say hello. After a few minutes, I told Max I had to go back to work. He just lost it. He wasn’t finished eating, but we had to take him out of the high chair he was so distraught. After that (Friday?), I waited until Max was napping before I left my office for a quick break. Sigh. I like having little snippets of the day with him, but it just isn’t worth the drama for us all.

I’m almost positive this is normal behavior/separation anxiety stuff, but there is a tad of worry and doubt. With all the talk of abuse by a care giver, I have paused to reflect if this could be a concern/issue and really don’t think it is. Max is happy to see Noemi. He is happy and laughs around her. I have faith in trust in her. But, is has caused me to pause and reflect.

And, I don’t know what the matter with me is. I blew off my first meeting of the day since there is no attendance/roll call taken and I didn’t have to give an update. My second meeting of the day was cancelled. Instead of getting work done that I HAVE to do before I go on vacation at the end of the week, I’ve been farting around browsing the internet, writing this, and starting laundry since Noemi didn’t start it before she took Max to the park since he was being a total cry baby for me this morning.

I’m just so not in the mood to work and feeling so blah and tired and it is only Monday morning. Think I could get away with being a cry baby too?

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