Reminding myself

I feel like crap. Stuffy nose, can't breath, blah, blah, blah. So tired I've just been wanting to curl up in bed all day, but alas work and chores and things to be done. And, a certain 3 year old is still not asleep an hour after bedtime. A few minutes ago he came out to tell me his toe hurt, then he had to go to the bathroom, then he needed to tell me he loved me, now he needs water...cold water. Anyway, just reminding myself that it really is all worth it and part of the package.


I've been waiting for this one to come home from school. Max made it for mothers day. It is a picture of me and says "I love my mom because she's beautiful. She gives me hugs and kisses."
Max making baby food, just like his momma. He got a bunch of kumquats at this party we went to and he had to bring a bunch home for his babies.
And, I know I'm biased and all, but I just can't help myself, as they are just so beautiful. I just look at them and am stunned that such beauty exists in my children.

Vacation Update (with pics)

After the difficult start, our vacation has been going along fine. Yes, with an active three year old, there are behavioral issues here and there, but mostly Max is just pushing to the limit and not crossing the line. I'm sure it helps (and by design) I've had something planned every few days that he really wants to do as incentive to being a good listener and adequate behavior. We took the Christmas train to the north pole to see Santa over the weekend. It was Max's first Santa visit and he loved it. Probably, he loved the fact that a train ride was involved even more. Monday, he and I ran a slew of errands to get ready for the holiday and today we headed to Santa Barbara to the zoo and beach. Again, I think seeing the animals and the beach were fine side dishes, but he got to ride the zoo train twice. Oh, what a thrill for a train enamored three year old boy. I'm solo with the kids for the next 2 days. Well, my mom and my sister are coming tomorrow mid day and staying over for Christmas so that will be nice. I'm ready, stress free, and hoping for a half decent night sleep for the holidays. The last few nights have been a blur, but I know there were a lot of wakings and each kid was up at least once with 2 out of the three up at least twice. Either way, I've got a Honey Baked Ham dinner with some easy appetizers and veggies to heat and everything else is ready, ready, ready. I'm looking forward to the holiday and Max is looking forward to Santa. This year he really seem to get it. When we were running errands, he kept looking at all the houses and saying which one has a chimney and which didn't. Last week, we spent a good amount of time for several days (even out in the rain) in the back yard staring and pondering our chimney. He amazed me when he asked what happens if there is a fire in the fireplace. The kid is always thinking. He's always coming up with things like that. Anyway, I'm sure I'm rambling at this point so over and out for the duration. Merry Christmas for those who celebrate and Happy Holidays for those that don't.

Week 5

Ms. Nora sleeping soundly in her new big girl crib. I've kicked myself a few times for only bringing a camera once a week. I missed getting a shot of her from last Saturday off oxygen and only with a small feeding tube in her nose. Still, I think her youthful beauty and peace shines through. :)Some one on one cuddle time with mommy who is back to wearing a mask since she's on 3 litres of pressure (but 21%, room air oxygen). Notice her big, big girl crib in the background. She's moving up in the world. No little bassinet for her.
Ray, taken by surprise when his dear sweet mommy plucked his lunch right out of his mouth for a photo op causing him to spit out his meal in surprise.
Ray after a quick wipe with the burp cloth already trying to figure out what this camera business is about, just like his big brother who was always so fascinated with the camera itself that it was almost impossible to get him to smile.
Mommy holding Ray after his meal. They have him nippling each and every meal eight times a day right now which has him tuckered out. According to the nurses, they are pushing him to feed and grow so he can be sent home. Notice his tiny little bassinet in the background. Poor Ray has to share a nurse and gets very little space while his sister gets her personal nurse and a mansion by comparison.
Nora's nurse pulled up the lab results which seemed to indicated that my latest milk culture was negative for group B strep and it was final, but the docs hadn't seen the babes yet by the time I had to leave. And, I didn't get a chance to catch them before putting Max to bed and we are in the middle of no call or visit shift change at the hospital so I don't know if there were any changes in orders yet and if the docs agree the my milk is free and clear to be used. I sure hope so. Pumping is bad enough as it is. Hard to get too motivated not knowing if it all is going to need to be tossed and time spent completely wasted (other than to keep supply up).

Ray's nurse seemed to think 2 weeks go home for Ray was probably realistic. She said maybe sooner. I'm hoping he stays healthy and strong and continues to lead the charmed life so that can happen. It will make my life more complicated from a logistical stand point. Not only because of having one in the hospital and one at home, but also the added first peds appointments that come with a babe going home since my peds office is no where near my home and halfway between home and the hospital.

Week 3

It has been 3 weeks now, 21 days since my babes have been born. I know you are not supposed to wish your life away, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't wishing for the next few weeks/month to just be gone. I'd like to fast forward until I have both of my babies home with me with them healthy, and strong, and where I can cuddle and kiss them as much as I want, when I want. In those 21 days I have held Nora only 3 times for a total of about 100 minutes. And, probably I will not be able to hold her much if at all this next week either. It really just breaks my heart and makes me cry. Mostly, I can just go on auto pilot and not think about things too much and just visit and do what I have to do. Then, things like today happen that just rock me off my foundation a bit.

Typhoid Nora, awake for the camera. Anyone else think she is pleading for me to get her out of there, just make it all better, or at least just hold her and give her hugs and kisses? Ray, stretching in for a nap after some mommy cuddle time.

Mr. Mom

Max was "mommy" today while I was daddy and then "Max". Then, he moved on to being doctor man, orchestra man, (train) engineer, and several other professions.



Look at that smile in the first one. Do you know how rare it is for me to be able to capture a smile of that kid on film?

I changed mid morning so I could put what I was wearing into the laundry and asked Max if he wanted to change as well as he was still in his PJ's. He said, yes, he did and into mommy's shirt. Okay, then...we head off to my room to pick and as I'm offering him choices, he is into another drawer and sure he wants my purple summer PJ's. He had a great time trooping around the house in this all morning, checking himself out in the mirror a few times. And, I do have to say, purple is a good color for him.

He submitted to wearing a diaper during "rest time" (where I rested and he mostly left me alone) at which time he was done fashoning mommy wear and was pretty much naked all afternoon.

With Sunday school being over, we went to Saturday evening service. As such, today...was a rare and glorious day. We had no place we had to be and no one we had to see. In fact, other than talking to a neighbor for a few minutes when out walking the dog this morning, I don't think either one of us talked to anyone else today. It was really nice and I think we both needed it. A few times, Max said "No Mimi today. Just momma and Max?" When I agreed with him, he asked "Where we going?" I said, we don't have plans to go anywhere. Do you want to go someplace? And, his answer was "no". His behavior was much better than (was it?) last weekend? He did a few stunts and is still torturing the dog more than I would like (and got put into time out twice for not listening and being mean to the dog). However, overall, it was really a nice, pleasant, easy going day for us both.

ETA: If you are a type of person who notices the background of pictures, all those runners you see over the tile are because Shadow is very old and can't walk on the tile directly any more without slipping. The current solution to that is those under rug mats that were cheap at Costco.

Today

The Double Snap-N-Go

When I went out with the girls the other night, I scored a car load of baby items including (but not limited to) two infant car seats with 4 bases with the Snap-N-Go. As soon as Max saw the Snap-N-Go unloaded on Friday, he just knew he had to push it. Forget the twins, he had big plans for it and it has already made a few trips around the block.

The Pony Ride

At the park near the LA Zoo, there are many, many different attractions one of which is a $3 pony ride. There was a train ride in the same area and, of course, we had to ride that before and after the ponies. Max is pointing out the train here and telling all about his train ride.

After the ponies and a second train ride we headed to the Merry-Go-Round for a couple of spins. Max was begging for more, but mom had had enough.

Swimming In The "little" Pool

After lunch and "rest time" in which mommy actually dozed off and Max didn't come close, we headed outside. Max tried to talk me into getting in the big pool, but quickly made do with the little pool. I'm really fortunate that I have a hot water hook up outside so was able to fill the pool with warm water as it probably would have been too cold to play for long otherwise. Yes, he had to have every ball he owns in with him. Notice Poo watching him. He got the chair and Poo himself and set that up as I was turning off the water. Shortly after, Poo took a few dives, a slide or two, and swam a bit with Max because he "need my friends Mommy". Max was really impressed with how heavy Poo got. Max took a break from the pool to give Poo a ride in his car.

Another fun day. However, since the day started early around here with Max climbing in bed with me somewhere around 4 am (at least he fell back asleep for a few hours where I only dozed a bit), I'm glad it's done and he is zonked out giving me a bit of free time before bed myself. The only good thing about this early morning was that I found a little clock that my mom had given Max that apparently had an alarm to go off at 5:10 am. No wonder Max has been waking up in that early 5 am hour so much lately. I'm hoping that fixing that will allow both of us a bit more sleep in the mornings.

No, No Kool Aid Here!

Here are the latest professional pictures of Max and I from December 31, 2006. Finally got around to scanning them tonight. I had planned on tackling my office and bills this evening. Instead, I chatted on the phone with a friend for 90 + minutes after I put Max to bed, then was unmotavated. I came to the computer to turn it off and got side tracked. Several hours later...here I am. I was thinking earlier today about how I always wanted to be the Koolaid Mom before having a child and now that I have one, I wouldn't give him Koolaid to drink. Max gets water or milk. Okay, I did give him a sip of my Black Cherry Fresca tonight. Yes, he had a major meltdown when he couldn't have more. It wasn't pretty. Typically, I don't drink anything but water when Max is around so I don't mind sharing my drink with him. Yes, I did grow up drinking Koolaid, and Tang for that matter. Remember Tang? And, I survived, but would rather not get Max into the habit so young. There are plenty of years for corrupt eating and drinking habits to come. I'll just try to hold them off as long as possible.